Aramex Antics

Thank you for the the delightful e-mail.

From Day 1, I knew Aramex was lacking.

A)They switched my US and UK address with each other, in the FIRST e-mail they sent me, causing my first few orders to go to the wrong place.

B)They rarely picked up my phone calls, when I needed help to clear the mix-up.

C)When someone finally picked up, he was overly-friendly (read: flirtatious), which was the cause of a lot of angst, "Do I report him? Or am I being too sensitive?"

D)The packages, which were shipped super fast when they first started, were now being shipped after a few days.

E)They jacked up the prices.

F)uck you, Aramex.

My shipment arrived in Kuwait on October 15th. Today is the 22nd. What the hell? I can not and will not get used to their incompetence. After calling them and hoping that someone, anyone, other than Mr Extra-Friendly would pick up. Eventually, someone did but unfortunately, it was the same someone who switched the mailbox address. I asked her what's up.

Her explanation, or what I understood from her, was that my package was being held at customs, and that I could go pick it up right away if I wanted. The other option was to get Aramex to pick it up for me and deliver it to me which could take up to 5 or more days. The latter would also be much more expensive. My normal shipment charge is KD13 which is more or less what I normally pay for shipping. Fine. Now with this new customs thing, I could be looking at paying KD30-50 and that's not counting the actual price of the crap I'm buying plus tax. We3. We3. We3.

What Would King Lionidis Do?

Sharm el-Sheikh (8 days)

The Idea
A couple of months ago, back in Lebanon, my favorite cousin S. and I were busy enjoying one of our favorite past-times which was, lamenting the fact that we were not boys. Another equally amusing past-time was "What we would do if we were born as boys". We were both regularly interrogated by our families, especially if we were going out with a new friend or to a place we hadn't been to before. We also had a 10:30pm curfew (on good days).

The fact that boys did not have a curfew, could go and come as they please, and could spend the night outdoors held the greatest allure of all, to us. I also wanted to go hadaag (fishing), street race in Sabhan, and travel the world with friends, among a few things. S. envied them their super-fast showers. She also wanted to play Water&Soap Football, and wear shorts and flip-flops for the rest of her life, among other things.

It irked us, when we saw guys parked on the side of the road at midnight (we'd be headed back from a wedding), just chatting away without a care in the world. It also charmed us how quickly they became friends. Before we went to sleep, S. and I had worked ourselves into an indignant rage. We vowed we would travel without our parents, soon.

S. went back to Kuwait a few weeks before me. She texted me about Sharm el-Sheikh. Honestly, I didn't care where we went as long as we went. She's been working on her father ever since Lebanon, apparently 'cuz he caved right away, on the sole condition that she take her brother with her. She and I anticipated a lot of groveling to convince her younger brother to take us. Thanfully, he agreed right away, saying that he was bringing his friend Yusif with him. I whined a little to my dad 'til he eventually got fed up and told me to ask my younger brother (how messed up is it that our younger brothers are our guardians?) My younger brother only agreed after he found out that S's brother was going with us. So S. bought 4 tickets (Sept.26-Oct.3) to Sharm el-Shiekh.

The Wait
During the Holy Month of Ramadan, S. and I made a pact not to talk of our trip lest we jinx it. The thing is, we did the math and apparently it was going to be strawberry season for both of us during our trip. She loaded up on cinnamon tea, and got hers to skip a week, so she was in the clear. I, hung out with her a lot, hoping that our periods would synchronize. No such luck. I would not be able to swim on the 26th, and 27th, the first two days of our trip.

Her father drilled her brother, day in and day out, telling him not to take his eyes off us, over there. My dad tried to convince us to cancel our trip because of the swine flu. Mid-Ramadan both our fathers urged me to start packing my bag because they knew I was going to do it last minute and end up being late and might miss my plane (Take-off was at 11:00am). S. finally deemed the time right to reserve a hotel, needless to say pickings were sparse.

Preparations
Yeah... I didn't do any of that. A day before my trip, my darling father realized I had no intention of actually preparing for my trip (I was at the salon getting a mani-pedi and a blow-out) so he went out and got me an all-blue snorkeling set with matching blue Crocs from Nasr Al-Riyathi. Isn't he a sweetheart? He also wanted to get me an underwater camera but it was a Friday and most places were closed or getting ready to close.

At night I was too excited to sleep but too tired to pack my bag so I compromised by making a list of what to pack. At 7:00am I realized I had to get to work. So, I took a quick shower, being extra careful not to get my hair wet. Then I got the list out and packed my suitcase. I put a little bit of makeup (stuffin my makeup bag in my suitcase when I was done), and got dressed. Finally, my suitcase was ready to be locked.

At the Airport
I was at the airport by 9:30am. My uncle, his wife, and their daughter S. were all waiting for me at the check-in counter. Right before they whisked my suitcase away, I realized that I couldn't tell it apart. I needed something to distinguish it from all the other bags on the conveyor belt. So, I got out my Disney Princess Bandaids and stuck a few on the bag.

We said our goodbyes and headed straight towards our Gate. Then S. and I decided we were starving so we headed back out to McDonald's which was right next to our gate. We got drinks and smuggled those yummy chocolate/orange pies in her purse.

In the Air
In the plane, S. and I roamed around 'till we found seats we liked which just happened to be in the same row as her brother and his friend which turned out nicely because our plane made a 45 minute stop in Luxor. Yusuf who had been busy flirting with the young stewardess during the entire flight managed to get each once of us a blank piece of paper and a pen for us to play that "insaan, 7aywaan, jamaad" game. It amused me that all of us were in our early 20's and yet were so engrossed in our little game. After that, I got my dad's digital camera out and went crazy taking pictures of everything including the horrid airplane food. At that point, S. and I weren't even finishing each other's sentences, we were saying the exact same things in unison... which cracked us up. It lasted all through-out the trip.

Touchdown
We finally reached Sharm el-Shiekh at 3:00pm. My sister had assured me that our hotel would send a bus for us. That was not so. Transportation was not a problem though 'cuz as soon as we exited the airport, we were hounded by a plethora of cab drivers asking if we needed their services. The cab ride from the airport to our hotel took about 5-10 minutes.

Check In
We parked outside in the spacious parking lot of Movenpick/Maritim Jolie Ville Resort and Casino. We had to pass through metal detectors and the security dudes peeked in our handbags. It's all because of the bombings a few years ago in that same hotel. The guys checked us in. Each one of us got a keycard for the room, another card to let us into the dining hall for our complimentary breakfast, and another card to let us use the resort's towels at the beach or pool. I let S. hold on to mine, since I would most likely lose them. We followed the boys to a 6 seater golf car which we assumed would take us to our rooms. Instead of taking us deeper into the hotel, he took a left and headed towards the gate, where a guard opened the gate for him. He headed across the street, where a cop(?) blew his whistle and raised his palm for the cars to stop so we could cross in our little golf car. We passed by our hotel's casino on our right. Then we passed a pool (saltwater he informed us), tennis courts, and finally our room.

Sea-side vs Mountain-side
Our room numbers were 3304 and 3305... in the sport area (mountain side). My sister tried to explain the relevance of mountain-side and sea-side to me but I couldn't visualize it so I didn't get it. I'll try to do a better job of explaning though.

Let's say TGIFridays on Gulf Road is Movenpick Resort. It's situated right on the beach so that would make it sea-side. Let's say that the Plaza Athanee is also part of the Movenpick Resort. It's situated far away from the beach so that would make it desert-side. Over in Sharm, they've got mountains, which makes it mountain-side. Now if you lived in Plaza Athanee (mountain-side) you would have to cross the street (Gulf Road) to get to the sea. That's where the golf cars come in.

The Room
The resort's lodging consisted of two story buildings (which I'm going to refer to as chalets from now on) with about 8 or 12 suites per building. The further you are from the sea, the cheaper your room is. Since our rooms were all the way across the street on the mountain side, that meant our rooms were dirt cheap. Also, the further you are from the sea, the more the quality of the room deteriorates.

If you walk into our room, on the left, there's a bathroom door, a floor-length mirror (Thank you, God!), and the place where you insert the room's keycard so the electricity comes on (lights, air-conditioning, tv). On the right, there's a pretty spacious closet bereft of any hangers, but hey, at least it's got a safety deposit box, right? Straight ahead is a door, which if you open it, will lead you into the bedroom.

If you wanna see what the room looks like, check out the third picture. There's more to the vanity table and mirror, it's actually much much longer. Right beneath the television is a useless fridge that does not cool at all. The bed is actually 2 beds pushed together, and 1 king-sized blanket draped over both. For the record, as soon as we arrived, I saw a bug roaming around on the bed. See the stripey red/yellow/orange curtain on the right (next to the tv?)? Obviously, there's the exact same stripey curtain on the left side. Well, there's a door there, that leads to a little balcony.

The balcony has a little table and two chairs identical to the ones in room. Also surrounding the balcony is a tall hedge made up of all sorts of plants and pretty flowers which means while sitting outside, you can still get a little privacy. Set one foot out of the hedge and you will land in mud, I know 'cuz I tried.

The bathroom has a walk-in shower with a sliding door (which everyone even skinny bitches will end up banged up in), and there's a cute little hair-dryer, and even cuter magnifying mirror. The bathroom amnenities looked cheap and disgusting. The soap actually made our hands dirtier. The towels were threadbare. To change all of the above, all we had to do was tip the housekeeping dude hovering next to us and he got us clean sheets, clean towels, hangers, and ironing board, and an iron, and extra tp and tissue boxes. So to recap, two rooms (changing room, bedroom), a bathroom, and a balcony.

Sport Area
We were a bit miffed at the state of our room, but like I said we quickly fixed that, and besides we were still on a buzz from traveling without our families (we conveniently forgot about her brother being there to supervise). We unpacked, making a mess out of the room. Then we freshened up and relaxed until the guys came and got us. We called a golf car. The Egyptian dude who picked up assured us that the golf car was on it's way so we waited outside in the Gazebo. Honestly, apart from being far the "sport area" or mountain-side wasn't so bad. I liked the well-manicured gardens, the fragrant scent of flowers wafting on the slight breeze, the soft lighting, the comfy furniture (bamboo? raffia?), and the friendly staff. It really was a beautiful place.

The golf car picked us up from the Gazebo and headed straight ahead. We passed by tennis courts on either side where tennis instructors were teaching little kids how to play. We passed by buildings on both side but I can't for the life of me recall what their names were or what they were for. I believe one was the spa building. Then we reached the sea-water pool which had a jacuzzi and various other water-spurting mechanisms. There was a bar right next to the pool which I hadn't noticed before.

Then we headed straight towards Gulf Road. The cop paused traffic for us 'til we reached the other side safely. Someone opened the big gate. We drove through and headed straight ahead. We were now in the "Front Area" as opposed to our unpopular "Sport Area".

Front Area
If I thought the "Sport Area" was pretty, the "Front Area" was stunning! The flowers (see I'm not a flower person AT ALL but even I was moved)! The Fountains (every few blocks)! PRETTY! There were chalets on both sides. It was very scenic but quite long. Again, I understood the benefits of the golf car.

Finally we came to another gazebo with comfy chairs, and tables, and ashtrays on said tables. Unlike the other gazebo, this one was actually manned by one of the hotel's security dudes. We drove on through the gazebo and headed straight ahead til we came across a pool much larger than the one in the "Sports Area". The water looked so inviting, especially with the statue of two dolphins hoisted above the water right in the center of the pool. The driver maneuvered his way towards the sea-side path, where he dropped us off. I saw the remains of a carriage and contemplated taking a picture of it but decided against it. Maybe the carriage is what they used in the olden days as opposed to the golf car nowadays?

The Beach
We walked through another metal detector and headed straight ahead. Down some steps, on the left was something a little more than a make-shift stand where... I wanna say cabana boy, but no.... anyways we headed straight ahead on wooden rungs buried deep in the sand. Eventually the rungs ran out. All around us were sunbeds, grouped into 4's or more under the most charming umbrellas ever. I swear my whole trip was worth it just cuz I got to see the umbrellas. It was so kitschy! It made my trip feel more authentic to me.

In the water, there was some sort of floating path (it looked like it was made out of gasoline cans) that eventually led to a floating platform with a little metal 3-step standard pool ladder leading into the water. A boat and some other water related vehicles were docked at the side of the floating platform. Of course the boys ran across the floating path to get to the platform. S. and I preffered to stay on dry land and take pictures as opposed to chancing getting our clothes wet. 'Sides, I was still "surfing the crimson wave". The boys came back and claimed that they were hungry which was no surprise because apart from airplane food being vile, it is also not very filling.

Beach Path
We headed back towards the sea-side walk or path or whatever which was mostly made out of cobblestone... or something like it. We saw so many restaurants on our left, and on our right. The boys had stopped caring ways ago but I was adamnant about not getting food poisoning. Yeah, yeah I've heard all the horror stories.

After walking for quite a bit, we reached the Presidential Suite of our resort. It was on our right. It overlooked the sea. It was huge. It had it's own garden. It even had it's own security staff outside guarding the place. Of course, a group of Kuwaiti boys were occupying it.

A little bit after that, the restaurants on the right, turned into shops. Finally, there was an alleyway that led straight into the middle of Naama Bay Street or King of Bahrain Street (can't remember his name....) We turned right and headed into the alley where we were ambushed by a tanned little elf. He was taller than me but I like to make myself feel better by calling people names. Elf had a name which happened to be Bob. Bob had taken a shine to S. I'd seen it time and time again. One look at her and they fall, hard. My cousin is what I like to call an Arabian Beauty. She has huge eyes with looong lashes (mashalla), a cute little snub nose, and full pouty lips.

So I told her to ask him where we could get clean food. The guys chimed in that they wanted seafood. So he directed us to Simsoon or another equally lame name. Oh yeah, almost forgot. Bob was part of this company that organized trips. Scuba diving, snorkeling, camel rides in the mountain, 4x4 off-roading, etc...

First Con
We were dragging our feet by then. All of us had run out of energy. Right next to Bob's stand were a few shops on either side all urging us to come in. One of the stores was an herbal and spice store (7awway). I found that odd. So we walked and walked and walked and walked. Then we climbed a hell of a lot of stairs.

Finally at Samsoon, we chose a table overlooking Hard Rock Cafe. The waiter asked us if we would like a set selection of seafood. We said no. We would like a little bit of everything. We didn't even glance at the menu. When the boys asked for the price, the waiter replied, "Don't worry about it". He got 4 Lobsters, 4 huge crabs, 4 of everything, really. The food was deelish! The waiter brought over the check. Our bill was KD 75. I quickly took my camera out and recorded the looks on everyone's faces. Everyone was super-shocked. The guys were like "Ouch!" Then again, each of us had their own lobster. I dunno...

After dinner, we returned to our hotel room to freshen up. Then I decided to prank call the guys. My cousin died laughing. Her brother couldn't tell it was me 'cuz I'd changed my voice. The second time I called, Yusif grabbed the phone, talked to me and told my cousin "Dude, that's your cousin." Boo.

Hard Rock Cafe
Then we went to there room where we found them getting ready for bed (or at least pretending to be getting ready for bed). We moaned and groaned til they agreed to take us out. They told us to dress up. So back to our rooms we went and we got dressed up. I wore a dress, put on makeup, wore my esperadillas and everything. It took us 2 hours but we got ready. We called a golf car and waited in the gazebo in the "Sport Area".

The golf car picked us up and dropped us at the entrace to Naama Bay which was side by side with the gate entrance to Movenpick "Front Area". We hoofed it 'til we got to Hard Rock Cafe. The guys payed for us. We got stamped, and went in. Each of us had a ticket for a free drink. I got us a table. The boys got our drinks. I snapped pictures.

S felt awkward 'cuz she wears a hijab and she didn't feel like she fit in. Her brother was in Hell. Yusuf was in Heaven. I was half-asleep 'cuz by then (3:00am) I'd spent more than 48 hours awake. We decided to go back to our hotel room, leaving Yusuf behind. Heels on their fucked up roads? Not a good idea. I stopped by a pharmacy to pick up make-up remover which turned out to be crap. Back at the hotel, S. and I were so quiet 'cuz we were so tired. We diligently cleaned up our make-up (the soap was disgusting), brushed our teeth, and changed into our pj's. I still managed to squeeze in some time to write in my diary.

Day 2
We woke up late. Called the guys (S. and her brother both bought egyptian sim cards). They had gone to the beach to swim. I still couldn't swim and S. wasn't gonna' go swimming alone so we just lazed in bed talking. I ordered club sandwiches for the both of us and soft drinks. The food was worse than the airplane food. On the bright side, it didn't make us sick.

I didn't feel like bothering with make-up. I dressed down in baggy green shorts, and a bright yellow top. Green toy watch on one wrist, yellow bangles in the other. Gold gladiators, and green aviators. I couldn't resist tying my hair into two ponytails, one on either side. It really got a reaction out of people.

I had my pedometer in my bag so I was good to go. We didn't even call up the golf car guy. We walked all the way across the street, through the metal detectors, across the long walk-away with fountains and flowers, across the gazebo, took a right at the beach path and headed straight, took a right into the alley, said Hi to Bob who stopped over for a chat.

We shopped a little bit. I bought the cutest black and blue bracelets. I got two for me, two for my girl, Jess, and two for S. I also got an underwater disposable camera (Kodak). I remembered that the towels at the hotel were okay for drying up in after swimming but they were not going to do, after a shower, so I was on the look-out for a towel. I found a nice red one that said "Sharm" on it.

Open-air Cafe
S. and I found the guys lounging at an open-air cafe. Each one of them held a sheesha/hooka pipe/water pipe/nargeeleh/etc... in hand. "Swine Flu!" I gasped. They assured me that the pipes were new. They open up the new pipe right in front of you. Obviously, you have to pay extra for the new "lay" (oye! That's what it reads on the bill). S. and I got Haagen Daaz icecream and hung out with the guys. Then S. and I remembered that we needed soap that actually cleans. So we headed to the supermarket at the top of the road, "Panorama" and bought snacks and stuff. I got tanning oil in golden. S. got Detol soap. We found Hibiscus-flavored Mirinda which tasted like metal... or blood.

It got dark so S. and I went back to our hotel room to freshen up (read: put some makeup on). A few hours later, we were done. We roamed around a bit 'til we finally settled on the open-air cafe we'd just been in, during the afternoon. The guys were gone. The place was packed. I wiggled my ponytails (as in Bewitched... the original... no? ok...) at the manager and he immediately set a table for us.

Apparently our cafe was the place to be for all "Khaleejis". The males befriended each other, moved their tables and chairs around, til they took up an entire section of the place. The smart waiters played "Khaleeji" music catering to the guys. The guys, without any stuffy religious people stiffling them, went wild. They danced and laughed and basically charmed everyone and anyone who glanced at them. A European couple were making their way across Naama Bay, but when they passed by our cafe, the women broke into a Khaleeji dance. It was so cute! Then the guy with her started dancing too. Obviously they weren't pros and didn't know how to dance or what arabs pass of as dance, but still they were so adorable! Everyone clapped and cheered them on. S. was all "Ah bliss!"

S. and I were pretty hungry by then. It was around midnight. So we ordered pizza from the open-air cafe. When it got there, first S. spilled her coke on it. She put some napkins on the pizza to soak up the coke. Then she took a slice and chewed, pulling a hair out of her mouth. She called the manager, he laughed it off. Then she showed him another hair in the pizza. "Would you like another pizza?" "em... we'd like the check please."
We walked to McDonald's which was really close to it, ordered dinner, and grabbed a golf cart to our hotel room where we pigged out.

Beach At Dawn
After dinner, it was around 2:30am. I convinced S. to go to the beach with me. We went to the beach and lounged on the sunbeds. An egyptian dude in a bedoin dishdasha literally popped up out of nowhere asking us which hotel we were from, and then asking us to keep our bags with us at all times. I wanted to catch the sunrise on camera. Later on, we got thirsty, so we walked across the beach path (opposite our usual way, away from Bob and co.) 'til we found an open baqala. Lucky! ... or so I thought. The dudes charged triple the actual price. Luckily we had dollars on us, for back-up so we used those. Around dawn, some dudes hit on us and wouldn't leave. The old dude in the dishdasha came to our rescue. My cousin was all "7ayaty!".

At 6:00am, S. and I walked back to the "Front Area" gazebo and asked the security guard to call a golf car for us. At our hotel room, we quickly changed. I wore shorts over my swimsuit, and a long floaty dress on top with my crocs. S. wore an Islamic swimsuit. We woke up the guys but only her brother showed up. Yusuf was not going to swim near us, out of respect... or something.

We gave the cabana boy our cards and he handed each one of us a towel. We layed out our towels on sunbeds in a prime spot. S. smeared on sunblock. While her brother and I smeared on suntan. The water was freezing! It literally took my breathe away. It took a few minutes for us to adjust. After that, I could literally see my nail polish on my toes. People were not exaggerating when they said "crystal clear". The fish were colorful and fearless. You really need a snorkling kit or at least goggles to do them justice, though.

It was still too early in the morning for people to show up so the beach was deserted, just the way S. liked it. We splashed around and had so much fun. Eventually, as more people showed up (S. pointed out a famous egyptian actress with her hubby and half a dozen kids. She looked gorgeous! I thought she was Lebanese at first. She showed up at the beach everyday with her family and S. coo'ed about how cute they were every single time she saw them) we mustered up the courage to swim deeper to yet another floating platform. Only this one was a perfect square with the little 3 step ladder in one corner. S. and I climbed the ladder and lay down on the floating gasoline can platform and tanned. Apparently, both platforms belonged to our hotel. Each hotel had it's own beach with it's own attractions and own security, etc...

There was a man on the platform next to us practicing Tai Chi or some shit like that. S. is the quiet and reserved one, usually, and I'm the wild one but that day I could not get her to lay off the man. He'd do a kick and she'd do the sound effects "Hiiiiiiiyah!" and so on. It cracked me up because A)It was pretty funny and B) She didn't think he could hear her whereas I'm 100% sure that he did but he ignored her.

Later on as more people showed up I saw some bright blue beneath me so I asked some British ladies who where there before me if the blue was fish or some divers. They told me that the blue was divers. Then they crowded around S. and I and asked us all sorts of questions about her hijaab. Then when they were done, they asked us where we from. When we said Kuwait. All of them started coo'ing "Oil! Oil! Rich people! Rich!" which cracked S. up. I was stiffling a laugh but then one of them turned to me and was all "Your english is very good!" I was this close to replying "So is yours", but I stiffled it.

Breakfast Time
We dried off and then went to try our "complimentary breakfast" at the mess hall. I hate buffets. They disgust me because people disgust me. Some people are filthy. They will use their fingers, put food from their plates back in the main dish, cough, sneeze, and perform other bodily functions next to or on the food, and finally, I have no clue if their hands are clean. So yeah, buffets gross me out but I was starving, and I like to think that most Europeans are very educated which means they will most definitely have much better hygiene.

It was by no means lavish but they had the basics covered. One table had all kinds of cereal from cornflakes to cocoa puffs. It also had a bowl of coconut shavings, a bowl of raisins, a bowl of that stuff you find on energy bars, that sticks to your teeth. Also, 3 kinds of milk were available, normal, low-fat, and soy. The main table had different kinds of bread, in one corner. Another corner had a fair selection of cheese slices. Another corner had fruits for the health freaks. People went crazy over the dried plum. The last corner was divided into two sections. One had fruit salads and other creamy desserts. The other was poultry that was switched up daily. One day it would be meatballs, the other day it would mini-sausages, the next it would be turkey slices, etc... The juice table had itty bitty glasses and a nice if not boring selection of juice available. The last table was manned by two or three chefs. One was making waffles and pancakes, with nuttella right next to it. The other on the far side was making scrambled eggs and mini croques.

So we stuffed our faces and went back to swimming. Keep in mind that S. and I had not slept all night. At about 1 we went back to the gazebo and asked the security dude to get us a golf car. We showered and slept and woke up at 10:00pm. The boys woke us up and told us to get dressed. I decided to wear a blue dress and blue crocs and I pulled it off.

ZaZa
Gazebo. Golf Car. Naama Bay Street. Had dinner at McDonalds. Finally, right next to Panorama supermarket were some very steep steps that led to an outdoor cafe overlooking Sharm el-Sheikh. It was pretty cool! Sadly, ZaZa was a seedy place. There was a make-shift stage with young girls belly-dancing. I was so thirsty so I'd ordered a strawberry milkshake. Yusif was delighted when one of the bellydancers hopped up on our table and shook her tush inches away from his face. Internally, I was all "aww that poor girl! I feel sorry for her". Then she shook her head and some of the sweat dripped off her hair and into my milkshake... before I'd even gotten a chance to take a sip. That's when I stopped feeling sorry for her. Then this guy accosted us. He offered to draw on henna tattoos for us. We declined but he wouldn't take no for an answer. Everyone was having a good time except me. It just wasn't my scene. Plus, the music was God-awful. I wanted to leave! Check out ZaZa in the next to last picture. It's pretty high up, huh?

Back To The Beach
S. moaned and groaned that I'd forced her to leave but whatevs. I'd stayed for a couple of hours. Enough. Back at the hotel, I changed into shorts and a light jacket, and Havaianas. My hair was a super-frizzy from the humidity so I pulled it into a cheerleader ponytail. S. and I headed towards the beach where we got into a slight altercation at dawn with the group of Kuwaiti guys and girls occupying the presidential suite. For the record, they started it.

After the sun came up, we went back to our hotel room, changed into our swimming gear and went to the beach again. By this point, the entire staff, all the security guards, street vendors, and novelty store sales assistants were familiar with S. and I. We'd always greet each other when our paths crossed. They'd always give us the latest gossip, or helpful hints. We swam a little. Had breakfast. Then went back to swimming.

It got kinda' crowded in the shallow end so S. and I decided to sunbathe instead. We slyly people-watched behind our shades. We saw all sorts of people from all over the world. I saw young mothers in their bikinis with their adorable newborns. I saw Germans, Italians, and Brits. I saw ancient couples still linking hands and flirting like teenagers. There were also happened to be a lot of handicapped people (there were specific sunbeds reserved for them in a prime spot) being wheeled onto the beach, where they leaned on their loved ones as they slowly made their way to the water. Not surprisingly, the newspaper dude who walked around yelling the names of well-known newspapers from each country, new a few phrases in every language. Everytime he passed by S. and I, he would yell out the name of a well-known Kuwaiti newspaper. It baffled S. how they could tell.

Our Pool
I lost track of time but a little later, while S. and I were sunbathing on the floating square platform, music came on from somewhere. We looked around 'til we found a dude (the water aerobics instructor) in the shallow end of the water going at it, while others formed a circle around him and tried but failed to copy his every move. We were tired and sleepy so we decided to head back to our hotel room. On our way back, on the golf car, the sea-water pool looked so inviting so we jumped in. Huge mistake. I honestly thought I was gonna get hypothermia or something. We asked the towel boy to turn on the jacuzzi, who consequently turned on the rest of the water spurting mechanisms (for lack of a better term). We hung out in the jacuzzi for 2 minutes before it's novelty wore off. S. preffered the water spurting pipes that literally beat down water on your back. I liked the swirly thing in the middle of the pool. The closer I swam to it, the farther it got, just like a rainbow... or maybe we were just going crazy from fatigue and lack of sleep.

Pink!
Showered. Blow-dryed hair. Slept. Woke up late. S. commented that my tan was gorgeous. So I overdid it with the hot pink. Hot pink nails, hot pink earrings, hot pink watch (toy watch from Claire's), hot pink lipstick, hot pink shirt, hot pink bag, hot pink sandals and denim cut-offs to offset my tan.

Bob
We realized that his was day 4 and we only had 4 more days 'til we left so S. and I decided to go to Bob and sign up for something. Bob had mentioned something about a desert safari at dawn on our first day. There was an exact same trip at dusk, but C'mon... AT DAWN. My favorite time of the day. All we knew is that we would get to drive Quad Runners ("Banshee") around the desert at dawn. Then we would stop at a Bedoin Camp for some authentic Bedoin Tea (yeah right). It didn't sound like much but all I heard was "Quad Runners" and "dawn" and I was sold. S. just wanted to try something, anything different before we went back to Kuwait.

Second Con
S. stopped by one of the stores next to Bob's shack. S. had promised the owner, on her first day there, that she'd return to his store to check it out. It happened to be our 4th day there. He'd overheard (how nosey!) that we had signed up for the desert safari and suggested we buy a chmaaq, keffeyeh, huge scarf. He then showed us a really cool way to tie it around our head. With a simple trick, we would managed to cover our mouth and nose (to protect us from the dust, he said). He asked for 100 per scarf. S. haggled with him 'til he agreed to give it to us at 80 per scarf. We thanked him warmly and were on our merry way, S. all smug with herself and me all proud of her. Then we passed by an identical set of scarves, the next store over. Out of curiosity, I told S. to ask him how much were the scarves. She asked. His answer? 30. S. was super-pissed. She tried to walk away but couldn't. She went up to the dude who'd swindled us and gave him a piece of her mind. Bob showed up and immediately started fighting the good fight. I'd forgotten that my sister had told me that whatever the asking price was, we should always pay for half and no more.

We had a quick dinner at McDonalds. I refused to eat at anywhere else besides McDonald's and Hotel's Breakfast Buffet. Since we hadn't gotten any food poisoning so far, why risk it? Just stick to safe places, or so I rationalized to S. After dinner we hung out at our open-air cafe. Notice how I say our, we were started to feel territorial. We went back to our room pretty early that night, around 2:30am. We quickly got ready for the Desert Safari.

Desert Safari
I wore a long-sleeve black blouse, jeans, and black sneakers. My hot pink handbag was also in tow. At 3:14 we got a phone call asking us to be at the reception because our "guide" was waiting for us. A golf car was sent to pick us up. Our guide (his name was Ramadan) was hawt! So we get into the mini-van and S. and the notion that S. and I are in a foreign country, out at dawn, with strangers cracked us up. There were two egyptian dudes already in the mini-van, aside from the driver and Ramadan who sat up front.

We went to all the other hotels to pick up more people (3 gorgeous Italians (at first I thought they were 3 gorgeous Saudi Arabians but then they spoke, and I fell in love!), two young egyptian couples, and two european couples) That's when S. and I realized that Sharm was huge! We'd only seen a part of it. There even was a cinema next to one of the hotels. Out of nowhere, the mini-van suddenly veered off road and headed straight 'til we reached... what looked to be a barn. This looks like the beginning of every horror movie I've seen, I told S. She laughed nervously. A dude with a huge video camera snapped open the camera lights and started filming us. That creeped me out even more. Creepy camera guy was all "What's your name, honey?" That's when Ramadan came to my rescue. He was all "Back off." Mentally I was all "I love you!" So then Ramadan tied all our scarves round our heads. I noticed everyone wore thier shades but I stupidly kept mine in my bag.

We each got on a Quad Runner. Then Ramadan taught us how to drive the thing. Then we were off. It was the coolest thing ever! We all drove in a straight line. Ramadan driving alongside us on his dirt bike with guard dogs (meant to protect us from what?) trailing behind him. I had soooo much fun. It was so dark we could barely see where we were going. It was sooo cool! After awhile we could start seeing outlines of the mountains as the sun started to rise. It was so relaxing and extremely peaceful.

I was kind of uncomfortable. My blouse was a smidge clingy (When did that happen? It used to be loose...) and I didn't know that riding a Quad Runner would be so bumpy, plus it kept riding up my back. Also I wore my scarf but I stupidly left my aviators in my bag. The wind made my eyes tear up which made my mascara burn. Which brings me to my next point, how blonde can I be? I see guys on Gulf Road on bikes wearing fanny packs ALL THE TIME. Why oh why did I bring my handbag with me? I set it between my thighs but with all the bumps in the desert it kept on sliding down and almost falling off. I had to drive with one hand most of the time.

The camera dude was filming us in a van that sped alongside us. So I hammed it up for the camera. I was all "Woohoo'ing" and flashing all kinds of victory signs and thumbs up sign. Extra cheeeeese! Finally, we stopped at a little makeshift camp. Ciggy break time for those who smoked. Then Ramadan gathered all of us in a half circle and made us yell "Sharm!" in unison. A few seconds later, we heard our voices echo across the mountains. That was surreal! He then made them all say "Dana". Then my cousin's name, and so on, 'til everyone had yelled all the girls' names and we'd heard the echoes.

I quickly took off my scarf and wore it around my neck, y'know like how guys do when they come out of the shower... (I wouldn't know. I'm just saying, I see guys walking around with a towel draped across the back of their neck all the time in the locker room on shows like One Tree Hill. Anyways the scarf made me feel less self-consious. I wore my aviators so my eyes wouldn't tear up. I tied my hair into a low pony-tail so it wouldn't bother me, and finally I slid my wrist in my bag. With my bag that way, I looked ridiculous! At least I was comfortable, yeah?

We got back on our Quad Runners and trailed each other. For another hour or so. We ran into other groups of Quad Runners. After I got a feel for it, I started speeding and it was insane! Later on the camera dude was all "Are you suicidal?" I was all "Have you ever driven one of these?" We finally stopped somewhere and we all got down again. This time Ramadan made us climb a little hill. We watched a huuuuuge sun rise up. It was so beautiful!

Then we walked a bit into a bedoin camp and sat on those hard cushions on the ground. I saw a camel and told one of the dudes at the camp that my cousin wanted to take a ride on a camel. They ambushed her and even though she was against it, later on she told me she was glad that she did it. It was hilarious watching her try to get on it. The bedoin guy told her to get on it and he would push her from behind (her tushy). At that point I was gasping for air. She glared at him indignantly, then told him to get on it and she'd follow his lead. So he got on and got off. Then she got on. The camel refused to stand up. Eventually it stood up and the bedoin guy walked it around the camp. Now, getting the camel to sit was a completely other matter. It was making wierd warbling noises which amused me endlessly. I have a.... let's say unique laugh... which amused the Italians (fidaytkum! I'm working on convincing S. that our next stop should be Italy!) endlessly. The camel set it's front legs down but it's hind legs were still up so S. looked like she was going to fall face first. It was such a weird angle. I laughed and laughed and laughed. Then when S. got down, she made them come after me. It wasn't so funny anymore when it was my turn. I screamed, I panicked, and then when I got to the other side of the camp and saw everyone watching me, I waved, and I was all "Hiiiii!" and they waved back "Hiii!" but I could totally tell they thought I was a smidge crazy. Ah well.

After that we drove back to camp. The camera guy told us that we could buy DVDs of our "Desert Safari". So S. and I each bought one. Sadly, after watching it in Kuwait, most of our blabbering and screamed were drowned out by some awful techno music. Ramadan made his move. I shot him down, breaking my own heart in the process. The mini-van drove everyone back to the hotel. S. and I were last. Everyone's eyelashes were white from the dust and sand. We looked scary... We were back in our hotel room around 8:00am. We were so knackered we slept without showering or eating (I know groooooss, right? Chub!)

Eskimo
Woke up at night. I was a little bit sunburnt and it kinda' hurt. My brother suggested I purchase an after-sun products. Oh yeah, forgot to mention, my dad and younger brother had been keeping tabs on me. They'd call me daily on S's Egyptian phone line so I could give them an update.

So S. took one look at me and burst out laughing. I had no clue why, but somehow, my upper lids, lower lids, and even upper part of my cheeks were super swollen. My eyes had dissappeared! I looked like an eskimo or at least what I imagine and Eskimo to look like! It didn't burn or itch but I looked funny! I quickly made S. take pictures of me (yes I'm a masochist). S's brother came in to check up on us and freaked out when he saw me which cracked S. up even more.

I covered it up with smudgy black eyeshadow and red lips. I also wore skinny jeans and a red drapey top with my wedges. Overkill, I know but... I LOOKED FUNNY! When we went out, Bob was all "You both always look beautiful but tonight you both look especially beautiful". I always knew I liked Bob. We signed up with him for the "Ras Mohammed Boat Trip" in the morning. Then we did what we did every night. McDonald's and then Open-air Cafe. S. and I had a blast! We also discovered that there was a quicker route through our hotel that led to Naama Bay Street. It was right next to the pool in the "Front Area". We also discovered that there was a baqala or mini-market right below the steps to adjascent to McDonald's. We couldn't believe that we'd missed all this and only discovred them when we were about to leave.

Boat Trip
S. took a nap while I painted my toenails 'cuz the old coat was chipping off. Then we got dressed and headed towards the meeting point at the beach at 9:00am where I think they made us walk all the way across Sharm el-Sheikh even though they said we were headed towards the dock.

The sun was sizzling! They made us stay out in the sun for about 30 minutes. I was bitching and complaining 'til I saw a women wearing a A'abaya walking behind her husband. I was sweltering in my shorts but she was wearing what was basically a cloak... in black... which absorbs sunlight and heat... or something. So I shut up and just smothered on some after-sun.

We finally got on the boat where they made us take our shoes off. The music was crap! I asked the someone to switch it to english... So they changed it Backstreet Boys. I thought asking for anything after 2000 was pushing it so I kept quiet. Again there was a pesky video camera guy and of course S. and I hammed it up even more for the camera. It was S's birthday so when she was below deck, I told everyone (S. and I made friends with everyone on the boat) to surprise her. The camera guy caught everything on tape.

S. and I befriended an all-female and one single male (who happens to be the #1 in the world for something related to training and ice hockey or was it skating? hmmm) Saudi Arabian family. We exchanged phone numbers with them and made plans to meet up at the open-air cafe (See? I told you it was popular). I also met the hottest group of guys I've ever seen in my entire life! At first I thought they were Khaleeji but I couldn't quite tell from where. Later on they told me that they were all from Sudan and all of them were doctors. The only non-doctor was the Bahraini dude. I made an off-hand comment about Sudanese having unique names. He asked me to give him an example. So I was like "Well I know this guy who is called Flan el Flan" Immediately hot Sudanese dude was like "Is his sister flana?" I was like "No freakin way!" He explained to me that everyone knows everyone in Sudan. Jess later on explained to me that Flana's dad is also some sort of politician over there. We exchanged e-mails! (walla '7afeefa ib hal safra...) Poor S. found yet another hair in her food. A lot happened on the boat trip but to sum it all up, let's just say it was Ma9'7ara. Oh and the fish were pretty too (although I mostly saw the stripey jail fish. Back at our beach, the fish are way more colorful).

We got back to our resort at 4:00pm. Showered. Took a nap. My burning shoulders woke me up. I was sunburnt and it was painful. My forehead and nose were peeling/flaking off. All those hours spent sun worshipping went to naught. S's brother had gotten her a birthday cake, tres sweet! S. and I went out to celebrate her birthday. We had a blast! We slept at dawn.

Last Night
Woke up late. I was still burnt/flaking/peeling. Since it was our last night in Sharm el Shiekh I decided to wear my pink cowboy hat. I filmed everything from the golf car ride to Naama Bay Street. Everything! S. and I had dinner at Fridays. Half-way through our meal, the normal lights were dimmed. Black lights, laser strobes, and a smoke machine were all turned on. The music changed into the latest mainstream stuff. Everyone started dancing. I had one hand on my heart, praying I wouldn't get food poisoning.

After that we went shopping for gifts. I hate haggling. So S. haggled half-heartedly for me. We just didn't have the energy for it, that night. At one point, this street vendor asked us where we from. We replied the usual reply "Bahrain." "What's the name of your King?", he asked. S. and I just stared at each other. Sad part is, one of the streets is named after Bahrain's King and we passed by it several times a day during the entire week.

We dumped our stuff back at the hotel and went back to our favorite open air cafe which was practically empty. All our friends had gone back to their countries. Luckily, as we got closer we found the Saudi girls who ushered us over. We hung out. Later on, they walked us to McDonald's where we exchanged phone numbers and e-mails. We bought our dinner and stuffed our faces at the hotel. Then we packed our bags 'cuz we were leaving the next day. Take-off was at 2:50pm.

Final Day
We swam at the beach at dawn. Had breakfast. Same old same old. The we swam some more. At 11:30pm we rode the banana. While on the banana S. and I had a conversation about how surreal it felt that we were leaving this beautiful place in a few hours and yet we were on a banana. We fell. We couldn't get back up 'cuz we were laughing so hard (actually it's cuz we have no upper body muscles). We got out. Showered. Etc...

We got ready super quick. Unfortunately, my bag would not close so I had to sit on it while S. pulled the zipper from one side and her brother pulled the other. I wore my cowboy hat to the airport and even in the plane but took it off once we reached Kuwait. Bleh. Back to '7iznee wa '7izik.

P.S.

S. and I had assumed that we'd lost at least 5KG in those 8 days of non-stop walking. My pedometer even proved it, that we'd take about 8,000 steps a day. My dad burst my bubble and said that the average person takes 10,000 steps a day. Yeah, so apparently I gainged 2KG :/ I'll just pretend that the fat has turned into muscle, that's why it weighs more.

Our fathers are super-pissed at us for getting so dark! My sister is begging me, to let her, take me to get exfoliate off my tan. S's mother refuses to take S. out with her anywhere until S. literally lightens up.

The underwater camera was crap. The film was ruined. Buy something in Egypt... and all. The Desert Safari DVD and the Boat Trip to Ras Mohammed DVD are hilarious!I now understand the appeal Sharm has on people. Everyone is in super-friendly mode over there. Everything is super laid back. There's so much fun stuff to do! Last but not least, the place is gorgeous! Sun, sea, and sand alone are pretty alluring, nevermind the rest.

I can understand the Egyptian language now! .... sorta'.

Om ill Banaat ام البنات

Just like every year, we get a plethora of Kuwaiti Tv Shows. This year I got hooked on Om ill Banaat after watching the first few episodes with half an eye. The timing is extremely convenient. I especially like that if it's not on one channel, you'll definitely find it airing on another.

The show circles around a naive, simpering, spineless wife (played by Suad Abdullah), her overbearing, violent, abusive husband (Ghanim Al Saleh) and their 6 daughters (Maraam the singer/actress plays one of the older daughters, and Shujoon Al-Hajery plays one of the younger daughters) and 1 son. Living with them is the husband's mute sister (I have a sneaking suspicion that she's not really a mute and that it's by choice) and outside in the annex building (tikfoon shloon batarjim mul7aq?) lives the errand boy/guard who happens to be blind (it's the "in" thing this year for Kuwaiti shows to have at least 1 blind character).

The father runs his household like a bootcamp. The wife does practically everything for her husband. The daughers have to line up every morning and every night to greet their father and kiss his forehead. All the women are forbidden from leaving the house except the daughters and even then only for school. Once they graduate from highschool, they are not allowed to further continue their studies. The father can afford hired help but instead the household chores are divided amongst his daughters. Once in a while, he brings them gifts in the form of gold bangles from his jewelry store and he distributes them evenly amongs his daughters. As for clothes, the material is brought to their home, where the girls choose what they want. That's far as their say goes. The rest is up to the father.

It's sad but simultaneously funny watching the wife, practically bend over backwards trying to please her husband. She refuses to do anything without first getting the consent of her husband. It's also pretty funny watching the girls and how they deal with their dad. It gets pretty depressing though at certain points. For example, there was a scene where one of the daughters got the highest GPA in her class/school/country (not sure on the deets). The girl had a dream of becoming a doctor and since she had the grades for it, it would've been a waste to stay. So she packed her bags and got her brother to sneak her out to the airport. She was leaving the country for the UK with her friends to continue thier studies. Not being able to resist bidding her mother goodbye, she called her mother from her friends' phone. The mother told the father. The father understandably freaked. First he called the airport from a payphone and said that there was a bomb on the plane. That bought him some time. Then he took his wife, and son to the airport where he formulated a plan to get his daughter to come outside. His plan was pure cheese but I guess that's what the director wanted. Anywho, the father grabbed his daughter by the hair, dragged her to car, and smashed her head a few times against the dashboard. Back home, he called all his daughters in to witness what he was about to do next. Then he chopped off her hair while the rest looked on. No matter how much I describe it, it's still not the same was watching it. I mean sure thier acting is crap but after a few episodes I kinda' got into it. That scene was so sad, I mean the dude broke her spirit.

The name of the show is Om ill Banaat so obviously it revolves around the mother. From day 1, after watching the way the mother was acting with the father, it was obvious that later on into the show, she'd eventually grow some. Kinda' like that J-Lo movie. Maybe even move out or something. As predicted, their only son dies in a car accident. The father asks his wife to find him a nice young thing to be his wife. He promises that the only reason he wants to find a wife is because he wants a son. After he gets a son, she can do whatever she wants with the second wife. Of course, the second wife turns out to be a girly-girl (Masha'el Zankawi) and soon the husband falls for her. After she moves in, she gets her mother (or the women who raised her) to move in as well. Then she manages to get him to change his strict ways for her. While hiding in the closet, the first wife overhears her super strict husband acting silly for the benefit of his new bride. He even goes so far as to insult his older wife just to make the newer one laugh. After that, she flips out and runs away, taking her daughters, her mute sister-in-law, and thier errand boy (who refused to leave them) with her. At the co-op, she calls her brother (who works for her husband at the jewelry store) and asks him for help. He picks them and takes them to his house telling her not to worry even though he's already contacted her husband. They get a wind of this and the ladies sneak out again, this time plus 1.

They have a hard time finding a place to stay. The blind errand boy knows some people. He hooks them up with a place to stay. It's a dump but they fix it up. Their neighbors are obnoxious but the women make friends with them enough to find out that their neighbors are actually kind-hearted gluttons. The ladies make a go of it.

After missing a few episodes in a row, I was curious to see if I could find someone uploading it on youtube, and I did. I found someone uploading each episode daily on youtube. She has split each 36 minute episode into 4 (9 minute) segments. The audio/visual quality is great! Even better, no commercials. Enjoy!

Click me

Melrose Place

"In an elegant Spanish-style apartment complex in the trendy Melrose neighborhood of Los Angeles, the lives and relationships of a diverse group of 20-somethings intertwine to form a close-knit surrogate family. Sydney Andrews (Laura Leighton, the original "Melrose Place") is the landlady, still beautiful at 40, and a central figure in the lives of all her tenants, especially handsome and rebellious David Breck (Shaun Sipos, "Shark"). Sydney started an affair with David despite her turbulent history with his estranged father, Dr. Michael Mancini (Thomas Calabro, the original "Melrose Place"). Both father and son learned through experience that Sydney was not above using blackmail to control people.

Another tenant, high-powered publicist Ella Simms (Katie Cassidy, "Supernatural"), once considered Sydney her mentor, but their friendship was destroyed by betrayal, and Sydney threatened to evict Ella and ruin her career. Sydney also played a pivotal role in the career of Auggie Kirkpatrick (Colin Egglesfield, "All My Children"). After they met at an AA meeting, she became a supportive friend to Auggie and encouraged his dream to become a chef. He’s now a successful sous chef at the trendy restaurant Coal, but his relationship with Sydney has gone sour since she began drinking again.

The other tenants include Lauren Yung (Stephanie Jacobsen, "Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles"), a medical student in desperate need of money to pay her student loans, and Jonah Miller (Michael Rady, "Swingtown"), an aspiring filmmaker who has just proposed to his live-in girlfriend Riley Richmond (Jessica Lucas, "Cloverfield"), a first-grade teacher. The newest tenant, wide-eyed 21-year-old Violet Foster (Ashlee Simpson-Wentz, "7th Heaven"), has just arrived in LA and is horrified to find a bloody body floating in the courtyard pool. David is the leading suspect but, as the police are soon to discover, almost everyone living at Melrose Place had a reason to want the deceased out of the way.

An updated version of the popular 1990s series, MELROSE PLACE is from CBS Television Studios with executive producers Todd Slavkin & Darren Swimmer ("Smallville"). Oscar-winner Davis Guggenheim ("An Inconvenient Truth") is the director and executive producer of the pilot. "





Read more to find out what I thought after watching the first episode (aka pilot)... Warning Spoiler Alert!

Guilty Pleasures (Fall Lineup 2009-10)

It's the Holy Month of Ramadan and we've all been good so here's a list of guilty pleasures that won't break your fast. Enjoy ;)

Fuschia = Girly-girl
Red = Awesome
Yellow = Hilarious
Blue = New

Tuesday, September 8

90210 (The CW) -- 2nd season; and they brought along a friend...

Melrose Place (The CW) -- Series premiere that nobody asked for (Good luck Ashlee!)

Wednesday, September 9

America's Next Top Model (The CW) -- 13th season spotlighting shorter women; 2-hour premiere

Thursday, September 10

The Vampire Diaries (The CW) -- Series premiere; will the Twilight crowd show up? (Another new vampire show? I seriously can't wait!)

Supernatural (The CW) -- 5th season, wrapping up the first mega-arc (LOVE LOVE LOVE)

Sunday, September 13

VMA '09 (MTV) -- It's the Video Music Awards!

Monday, September 14

One Tree Hill (The CW) -- 7th season


Gossip Girl (The CW) -- 3rd season

The Jay Leno Show (NBC)

Wednesday, September 16

The Beautiful Life (The CW) -- Series premiere (Yet another girly show!)

Thursday, September 17

Survivor (CBS) -- 19th season

Fringe (FOX) -- 2nd season

Monday, September 21

Heroes (NBC) -- 4th season 2-hour premiere

How I Met Your Mother (CBS) -- 5th season


The Big Bang Theory (CBS)-- 3rd season (Funniest. Show. Ever.)

Tuesday, September 22

The Forgotten (ABC) -- Series premiere


The Good Wife (CBS) -- Series premiere

Wednesday, September 23

Mercy (NBC) -- Series premiere (Another hospital show, this time about nurses)


Cougar Town (ABC) -- Series premiere


Eastwick (ABC) -- Series premiere; based on the Jack Nicholson movie (Witches!)

Thursday, September 24

Flash Forward (ABC) - Series premiere; or is it FlashForward? ABC can't make up their mind

Grey's Anatomy (ABC) -- 6th season 2-hour premiere (Oh George! Oh Izzy!)

Friday, September 25

Dollhouse (FOX) -- 2nd season (It wasn't canceled! Yay!)

Sunday, September 27

Desperate Housewives (ABC) -- 6th season

Dexter (Showtime) -- 4th season

Family Guy (FOX) -- 8th season


American Dad (FOX) -- 5th season

Monday, September 28

Lie to Me (FOX) -- 2nd season (Awesome Awesome Awesome!)

Tuesday, September 29

The Hills (MTV) -- 5th season fall premiere


The City (MTV) -- 2nd season

Thursday, October 1

Private Practice (ABC) -- 3rd season

Friday, October 9

Ugly Betty (ABC) -- 4th season 2-hour premiere (I can't wait!)

Sanctuary (Syfy) -- 2nd season (Right on!)

Wednesday, October 14

Nip/Tuck (FX) -- 6th and final season (awww final season... I are saddened!)

Tuesday, November 3

V (ABC) -- Series premiere (Hellz yeah!)

Friday, January 22

Caprica (Syfy) -- Series premiere (Yes! Yes! Yes!)


Spartacus: Blood & Sand (Starz) -- Series premiere (It aint Rome but it'll do, thank you God!)
 
If your favorite show is not included in the above, please click this link for the rest of the lineup.